Archive for July, 2012

Just a Girl Thing

Being a female comes with all sorts of frills and pains, but what confuses my husband and son the most is our “strange” food habits.  He use to think that I was just strange but after witnessing our daughter do the same exact things, he has come to realize that it’s “just a girl thing”. 


I have introduced my daughter to some really great things: such as dark chocolate and a  big spoonful of peanut butter for a late night snack.  This has always baffled my hubby but after hearing my daughter request this over a Popsicle many times he just goes with it.  There is also our technique of peeling or taking apart foods that men just don’t.  This includes kitkats which are always better eaten layer by layer, oreo’s that must be eaten cream first cookie wafers sometimes not at all, the soft portion of garlic bread hollowed out of the crust and of course pizza is cheese first.  But now he has learned to regret his choice of letting my 3yr. old daughter have one of my annual birthday/Christmas/Mother’s Day/Valentine gift Godiva dark chocolate truffles.  She now expects him to bring her the same at birthdays, Christmas and any other minor holidays.  If he does not remember he is met with a trembling lip and alligator tears which spur him to leave immediately and rectify the mistake. 


He now knows that there are “just girl things” and yes, it’s important not to upset the wife by forgetting or making fun of these times but NEVER to tease or God forbid, forget the daughter’s dark chocolate. 




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I had to raise my creep out meter to a new high recently.  A new creepy crawly has surpassed a long time leader; The Tree Frog (aka Green Demons).  Now this is not the cute little green frogs,  I’m referring to the massive four inch beasts that feel like you’ve just been hit by a Mack truck when they land on you.  These guys have been on the top since I was a kid and had one jump on my back as I went to the bathroom.  Imagine having to perform sweeps of the bathroom before you took a shower or went potty.  The big green demons used to swim up our toilet pipes and hide out just under the lid for optimum views of me screaming my head off, running in circles.  Even worse, was when you missed one and were later ambushed, naked, in the shower.


So, it has to be something truly evil to usurp the “Green Demons” .  I introduce the new winners; “Eight Legged Freaks”.  Living in Florida. we like most families have an in-ground pool.  Our pool goes from three feet to eight feet and I am often skimming toads off the top that have fallen into the chlorine death trap. However lately as the weather has become hotter every day, I am noticing an increase of spiders in the pool.  Why?  Who knows, you think they would be smarter than toads.  THEY ARE.  These spiders are not dead, they are ALIVE and HUGE.  Sitting at the bottom with an average circumference of five inches they plot my demise.  These arachnids sit and wait for my net to scoop them up, raise them out of the water and jump towards my face.  The fact that they sit for hours on the bottom without crawling their way up to freedom, just for giggles at the damage they cause my psyche, prove they are evil.  Honestly, how can they do that? 

  I believe the squirrels must have recruited them since they have not been able to cause me enough torment recently. 


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